![]() Here is a dismal rule of thumb: When a Hollywood adaptation of a family story involves the hero’s beloved animal pooping on his head, it’s a sign that the filmmakers are not lovers of their material.īetween the poop jokes, the Disney brand and the reunion of Depp with the director and screenwriters of Pirates of the Caribbean, you might be expecting a crude family action-comedy: Jack Sparrow meets Shrek. ![]() I’m reminded of the penguin pooping on Jim Carrey’s face in the also deplorable Mr. There, in a nutshell, is the movie’s attitude toward its source material. Then the horse stops to pass excrement - before dragging the future Lone Ranger’s head right through the pile of poop. When the film first brings together Tonto, Silver and the newly deputized Texas Ranger who will become our nominal hero, there’s a sequence with Tonto leading the horse and the unconscious Ranger unceremoniously dragging behind. This is not a moral lapse, it’s typical of the character’s cluelessness. ![]() Immediately he leaps on Silver and starts to ride away, callously leaving Tonto to die without so much as a thought - until belatedly realizing that he needs Tonto to show him where to go. Case in point: In one sequence, Tonto (Johnny Depp in yet another pasty-faced role) and the Lone Ranger (Armie Hammer, The Social Network) are left buried up to their necks, and the Ranger is rescued first (implausibly but not unpredictably). ![]()
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